Going Grey

I believe there is beauty in aging. Natural beauty that is considerably more valuable than eternal youth. Years of working hard and taking care of families weathers hands, but oh the stories they tell. Decades of laughter and smiles etch laugh lines into faces telling memories without saying a word. I think it is so sad that so much of our society values youthful looks (even if they are fake and look completely plastic) over what is a natural process. There is wisdom and beauty in aging that you just don’t get with youth, and I for one do not fear getting older. That being said, I am going grey, and pretty quickly. I am 32 years old. I don’t think I’m quite ready for that yet. To be honest, it doesn’t really bother me yet, but at the rate it’s going I could be completely grey within the next year or so. I’m not sure how I feel about that. I think that older women with grey hair look beautiful, but I don’t quite think I’m old enough to be completely grey. Perhaps that is hypocritical, I’m not sure. Either way, I’ll deal with it as it happens, but the thought of dying my hair with a bunch of chemicals just makes me shudder. Who knows, maybe it’ll stop changing, and then I won’t have to deal with it. I guess we’ll just wait and see.

family • Friday, April 30th, 2010 • 21 Comments »
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21 Responses to “Going Grey”

  1. kendra says:

    rosemary gladstar’s family herbal almost made me want to henna my hair again! almost. it took so long to grow out to its natural color!

  2. Adina says:

    I agree with you about society’s over emphasis on youthful looks. My hair starting going silver years ago. Then the stress on my body from the the car accidents sped up the process. I have a lot more silver than Miriam, which I think proves the stress factor.

    At one point I thought I’d just let my hair go naturally, but that was before I knew how early it would be. If I were to stop dying my hair, people would think I’m in my mid 40s. Right now people think I’m in my twenties. I just can’t win.

    Your hair is being frosted naturally. It’s nicely spaced and your hair has a number of shades in it. Basically your hair looks like you spend over $100 to get it frosted to blend in your grey.

    I don’t know that your hair will change as quickly as you’re thinking. Your body has done some major adjustments lately, which have most likely just temporarily sped up the process. I don’t know that you have any more than when I saw you last. Remember that you see more in the mirror than most see because people tend to grey around the face and in temple areas more.

  3. Mousy Brown says:

    I have just been to the hairdresser (for my once a year shear) and sat through the usual discussions of why I should dye my hair. Like you I never thought I would but it amazes me how other people react – my sister actually said she thought I was so brave to go out in public like that! and my mum is now less grey than me….I got my first grey hair in hospital the day after Jack was born and I look on it as a badge of honour – along with all the others that have arrived since. One of the blessings of the SJS situation is that as my all natural organic shampoo now makes my head bleed I guess the chance of ever using dye is gone even if I wanted too and along with it the pressure to give in. I’m going grey, I have allergies I guess I better get used to it and enjoy the money and time I would have wasted dyeing my hair enjoying myself instead! 😀

  4. Carla says:

    May I say that silver hair is lovely? Whether it is a stunning silver mane or is sparkles shot through other colors of hair, silver is gorgeous. Do what you want to, but I warn you that hair dye is a slippery slope which is hard to recover from. Before you reach for the bottle, take a look at http://goinggraylookinggreat.com/ and see what you think.

  5. Mandi says:

    I haven’t decided what to do about the gray hairs just yet. I’m only 29, and in the past 3 months these white/gray hairs are taking over my nice shiny black hair. lol
    For now I am leaving them. I have always thought that women should age gracefully.
    But, I don’t think I want to be totally gray before I hit 35.

  6. SparklePetal says:

    It’s strange how you never know what you’ll really feel about grey hair until it comes along. I don’t think I’ll want to dye… but maybe I will when it’s really happening. I’ve never used dye to alter my hair colour and I think it would be hard to find a dye that really looked like my own hair colour.

    My mum decided some years back that she would go the other way – fed up with her ‘badger’ look of brown and grey stripes, she asked her hairdresser to use highlights to make her silvery all over. It really suits her, but I suppose you need a good amount of grey before you make that decision!

  7. What a beautiful and vulnerable post. I am the same, I either want to go all grey or not at all – not liking the in between and tempted to get the hairdressed to make ammends!

  8. toasted says:

    Some of the most beautiful women I know have gone grey or almost grey when they’re young. Grey hair and a youthful face is very striking. I know it’s confronting when it’s on your own head. It’s easy for me to compliment those who go grey young though as I’m 38 and have being greying slowly and steadily so I slot easily into the ‘average’ greying category. Go with whatever you feel I reckon – as you are!
    I stumbled on your blog a while back – I like it, ta!

  9. Steph says:

    I’m having the same debate with myself. I swore I didn’t want to dye my hair and end up a brunette at 70 because I never could be brave and go grey. But I’m only 31 and the grey is just multiplying, I’m not sure I’m ready for that look yet. I’m considering henna, just for a few more years anyway.

  10. I remember a friend of my mother’s who was completely grey at what I guess now would be about 40 years old. I thought (I was 10) that she looked so beautiful, and I remember once telling her she looked as if she was 25 and she gave me the biggest hug. I think it was because she was so full of life, so smiling and warm. And it might have had something to do with her having wonderful wavy hair, full of its own energy, rather than the flat hair that my mum and I have. When mine goes grey it will be flat and grey. Yours looks like it will be far more like my mother’s friend.

  11. cathleen says:

    I turned grey at 36. And now I am, well, considerably older than that. I never colored it. I never regretted it, either. There is something quite intriguing about a youngish face with grey hair. I think , by leaving your hair grey it speaks volumes for your self-confidence. Besides, your grey looks quite pretty. And after reading your post….your inner beauty is glowing!!!

  12. Jennifer it’s so refreshing to see your post about going grey. I have an upcoming post on the topic coming soon. Hardly anyone is talking about the beauty of aging. No one is talking about what a gift it is it to allow ourselves to be right where we are supposed to be!

    I love your site, and that you are a crafter just like me 🙂


  13. AG Ambroult says:

    yep. I’m right there with you. I’m 35 and the grays at my temples are multip;ying. Not sure what I’ll do either. Like you, I’m not in a big hurry to come up with a solution, either.

  14. Elizabeth says:

    I got my first grey hairs when I was in my early thirties too. I tried dying it for a bit but the grey hairs always ended up a ridiculous-looking pink – I soon gave that game up.

    Now, in my late forties, it is still only a sprinkling of grey hairs – a bit salt and pepper – and I’m really looking forward to the day I go completely grey. I think grey hair can look wonderfully distinguished.

  15. Karen says:

    I am 30 and have had gray hair for three years or so now (not completely, more like yours). I do color it … with henna, which works wonderfully without the use of harsh chemicals. just an idea …

    I’ve heard that it’s genetic … I guess there’s a lot more I could be dealing with so I’ll take the prem. grays.

  16. Rosie Girl says:

    What an honest and open post. Yes, ever since I began having children three years ago the greys have been showing up on me too. Lately I’ve been thinking…geesh, I’m only 33, what’s up? But it’s so ironic. I’m also a consistently non-makeup wearing, non-hair-dyeing woman who has always appreciated and looked forward to aging naturally. Much luck to you, and thanks for this beautifully honest blog.

  17. I’ve not checked in with you in a while, but totally relate to this … I’m 51 and been dealing with it since I was 31. I thought you would like this, I memorized it from a greeting card I gave my grandmother thirty some years ago ….

    “Growing old, let me grow lovely,
    Laces and ivory and gold
    And silks need not be new.
    There is healing in old trees.
    Old streets, a glamour hold.
    Why may not I as well as these
    Grow lovely, growing old?”

    Lets go for it, ladies!

  18. ginny says:

    this is a great post… you do have wonderful hair.. i love all the colours and waves in it… i like the idea of ‘a spinkling of grey’ too but also the positive remarks that grey holds beauty.. ‘grow lovely, growing old’. i shall remember that.
    but it’s still the short sticky up ones which i have to pull out even though i have been told that they grow back doubled!!

  19. Peter says:

    33-year-old man here, dropping in after Googling “going grey”!
    I just wanted to say that your hair looks wonderful, and I wouldn’t change it for the world. Women who age naturally and gracefully are far more attractive (to me, anyway) than women who go for face-lifts, collagen, hair-dye, and so forth. The natural look, taken care of to show that you value yourself, is a very elegant and beautiful look.

  20. Peter says:

    Sorry – forgot to add this quote, which I think is a lovely one – “Grow old with me; the best is yet to be.”

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